The issue of Karma vs Accident
it's not good to take strong meds when you have a propensity to always fear the worst.
so i haven't taken anymore today.
I kind of freaked out this morning; i took my dog out for a walk in a slight drizzle...i figured we would be ok...i couldn't open up my bumbershoot (umbrella if you didn't know). and of course....on the way back...a downpour...and my poor dog...who was insistent that i pick him up and run...just got pathetically wet.
it's mellow dramatic to turn that into a feeling total uselessness isn't it?
either way....oh....back to one hand....
anyway....it freaked me out that i freaked out. I got back in the house and cried. I think it's just the drugs...my dog didn't mind after a while. he just cozied up with me like he always does.
i do plan on having physical therapy...i'm sure that will help out alot...
people have done more with less...right? people have won marathons and they have no legs....young people have been homeless...and they go to college.
so as i hang my head in shame for being afraid...I'll stop whining.
(is this my karma for every malintention that was ever in my heart? are these the seeds of bitterness in full bloom? am i always going to over-react to everything that happens in my life?)
i'm off to drink some tea and read some marge piercy....
everyone get out in the rain and have some fun....
peace
