La Reina

hi there how are u doing? me? tired but ok...all the laundry is done..work wasn't a complete drudgery and the weather was smooth and fine.

I also have interpol tickets. and im going to see them. praise the holy music gods.

But now Im broke so...everyone should send me their S&G greenstamps.

Im kidding. I have a job. Im never completely broke.

Im sitting here in silence..gazing around...strewn pieces of the new yorktimes sunday edition...mother jones...the phone book...and a postcard baring the images of Andy Warhol and Jean Michel Basquiat..both in boxing gear. Empty water bottles,used rolls of film,cds,my compostion notebook (the car journal..just in case I forget the regular journal...)my camera...and laundry hanging in various places...making the room smell oh so yummy and nice...

the curtains breathe,as curtains do, on breezey nights. and Im just left contented.

contented to sit here. all night until the sun comes up. sipping green tea and reading. or day dreaming. or pondering the end of the world and my new haircut; provided I actually get out to some salon someplace that is.

Its rare dear diary that your author has a night of complete peace. From where ever it is coming I can only hope it is not a random visit.

I love you and I thank You and You is Everyone and Everything.

This is the feeling of not needing. This is the blissfull point of having everything. This is the quiet people feel that have no commanders in their thoughts: that incessantly claim...that there is never enough.

I don't feel like I need more to eat. Or more to drink. Or more to watch. Or more to listen to.

I have had enough of everything today.

mystery upon mystery of my lack of tangled thoughts....I don't need to understand or unravel anything.

Its still all uneven. and uncoiled. but ask me If I need to satisfy you. ask me if somehow undoing myself is worth a nod of yours in my direction.

I look at myself in the reflection of my calmness and I think of that Pablo Neruda Poem La Reina..The Queen...

Yo te he nombrado reina

jennifer...I have named you queen...

There are taller ones than you,taller..there are purer ones than you..purer..there are lovelier ones than you..lovelier..

Pero tu eres la reina

But you are queen.

When you go through the streets no one recognizes you. No one sees your crystal crown, no one looks at the carpet of red gold that you tred as you pass, the nonexistant carpet.

And when you appear all the rivers sound in my body,bells shake the sky, and a hymn fills the world.

Only You and I,only you and I, my love, listen to it.

Jen..Yo te he nombrado reina...

Peace