Its all good its all the same

A. In the trenches

I'm dating someone. and I think this fight/flight/or freeze instinct I have is going to create a chasm between joy and myself.

I feel like Ive never been with someone before. this feels so completely.....unserious. He is very nice. Very easy going and attentive.

I don't know how to say this without feeling guilty for it..but...my heart wouldn't break if this doesn't work out. I wouldn't be devistated. I wouldn't curl up or freak out.

Im not as breakable as I used to be. Does that mean Ive grown up? Or does that mean Im a cold hearted person?

He is easy to talk to. that for me is very important...because I am uptight most of the time...when it comes to my feelings.

Im babbeling. I have so much more to say but I have to run to the store to get a video tape to YES...tape Friends.

and then Im off to work...lovely.

C's bit of wisdom for me: "Its all good...its all the same"...this nugget was conveyed to him by the now famous 7-11 girl.

I'll try to worry less I promise.

everyone be well

get outside.

get the new mission of burma cd.

yeah you remember them...admit it.

and god darn it yay the Pixies are finally coming nearby.

You can scream for joy now peoples.

I was starting to lose hope.

ok Im going now.

Love and Peace